[002] VIDEO

[doc_pompous]

[Today's video post reveals Simon against the usual backdrop of Medbay--it's clear he's a little exhausted from the blackout and subsequent jump, but he does his best to appear put-together and professional, because that's what you should do when addressing large amounts of people.]

At this point I think the customary welcome would be…more than a little redundant, so I'll try to be brief.

[He coughs a little, more to fill the silence than anything, clearly a little unaccustomed to making these kinds of announcements.]

My name is Simon, I'm one of the doctors on board. My background is in trauma surgery, but we're all used to working outside our specialties here. Physicians, nurses, laboratory technicians, you…get the idea.

I won't pretend we're not understaffed, or that the hours aren't long, but anything you can offer is appreciated. If you're interested in joining the medical team and have the knowledge or experience, let me know, and we can put you on staff.

[Simon's brow furrows. Even if he didn't know them very well, good medical personnel is something of a precious commodity in situations like this.]

We've lost a few good doctors recently, and we could use any willing volunteers.

Comments

[unparental]

That explains it. Okay, now I get it.

[ jenna has known topher since he arrived and adores his face and would rather attend counseling sessions with ward. ]

Just-- don't let me give anyone the kind of advice that leads to airlocks, okay?

[doc_pompous]

No, no, we'll be fine--you'll be fine. No one's getting airlocked.

[unparental]

So-- Simon, right? I'm Jenna.

[doc_pompous]

Yes! I mean, yes. I'm Simon. And...it's nice to meet you, Jenna.

[unparental]

So, we should probably have a talk, if you're kind of our fearless leader now.

...there are some extra details with me you should know-- just in the interest of full disclosure.

[doc_pompous]

I don't know about fearless. Or leader. [Ha ha ha haaa...] I'll work on it.

But, um. Sure. Whenever you'd like to discuss it.

[unparental]

Here's the thing they taught us in class-- when no one else is talking, the person everyone can hear ends up leader. Congratulations, you're the loudest guy at the party.

...how good are you at just accepting really weird and crazy stuff as fact, despite the weird and crazy?

[doc_pompous]

I've been inexplicably kidnapped onto a spaceship that may or may not be trying to kill us. I think I can handle weird and crazy.

[unparental]

I'm a vampire.

[ YOU SAID YOU COULD ROLL, SIMON. ]

[doc_pompous]

[HE THOUGHT HE COULD ROLL BUT HE WASN'T EXPECTING VAMPIRE]

Oh.

[okay Simon play it cool there are vampires on the network all the time don't say anything offensive you can do it]

So...synthetic blood?

[yeah]

[unparental]

Oh wow-- you're super bad at that.

[ but she's wryly amused, not offended. ]

Normally I'd be a lot more delicate with the reveal, but "why did you lie to me" is a much harder conversation than "I have to admit, you freaked me out at first". Sorry to slap you in the face with it.

...I used to do synthetic solely-- now I supplement with donations. From friends who know the deal and volunteer, because before you ask I would rather go back on full synthetic than steal from medbay's stash.

So. Go ahead-- if you say you don't have questions you're totally lying, and I have a thick skin. Ask away.

[doc_pompous]

Sorry, I'm--We don't--vampires don't exist, where I come from.

[We do, however, have space cannibals.]

That's...I'm not saying I don't believe you. I believe you. And thank you for telling me. It's not going to be a problem.

[unparental]

...but? Go on, I hear the but.

[ it's a big but simon. ]

[doc_pompous]

No! No, there's no but, I promise.

[Simon is just that awkward.]

[unparental]

...so you're just. Cool with me?

[ ...huh. ]

I have to say I'm both relieved and terrified there's another shoe.

[doc_pompous]

I...yes.

[Totally cool.]

No other shoes.

[unparental]

Uh-huh.

[ ALL THE FRYSQUINTS FOR YOU, SENOR TAM. ]

Will you hold it against me if I say 'okay sure, but if you find that shoe the offer of allowing potentially offensive or invasive questions is still open'?

[doc_pompous]

[No wait stop not as planned]

No, of course not! I mean, if you have people willing to donate, it's not really any of my business.

[unparental]

Just a little psych major hint? "It's not really any of my business" is uuuuusually a dead giveaway for "I'm judging you so bad right now".

[ which she would get, lbr. ]

[doc_pompous]

I'm really not judging, I promise. It's like I said, we don't--there's a distinct lack of the supernatural, where I come from.

[unparental]

Hence the 'ask me anything, even rude stuff' open forum.

I'm pretty well adjusted-- if you ask something I don't feel like answering, I'll just say that.

[ beat.

wait for it. ]

I don't bite, honest.

[ SHE COULDN'T HELP IT OKAY GOD. ]

[doc_pompous]

[Is this real life

yes

yes it is real life]

Touché. If I...think of anything to ask, I'll come straight to you.

[unparental]

I've been waiting to make that joke for ages, you're a prince among men.

[ jenna no

jenna why are you like this

oh well-adjusted happiness and no real serious crippling self-doubt or issues?

...maybe carry on then.

i guess. ]

It's a deal.