ataraxion | 003; video

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[Tommy's been scarce since the fog and rust overtook the Tranquility like a month ago. Sure, he's made appearances on the Network, here and there, but they've been few and far between. Other than that, he's mostly kept to himself, drinking at the bar or holing up in his room. The whole fucked up experience took a lot out of him, made him confront a few things that he'd been in denial about, namely: 1) he's dead and 2) he has a major drinking problem. Unfortunately, revelation number one fed into revelation number two, so...

As usual, Tommy's had a few too many to drink. It's rare that he gets on the Network sober, and today's no exception. He's sitting in his room, guitar propped on his lap, smiling, although it's more sarcastic than anything else. His words are a little slurred-- looking at him, you can practically smell the alcohol on his breath.]

Hey. So, I've been wondering. [He drums his hands lightly on the guitar.] How many of you are dead men walking? Or women, I guess.

I'm just curious. Wanna know how many of us are out there, people who can't go home, because they-- [He stops short, then laughs, shaking his head.] Because they're six feet fucking under.

Let's get a show of hands here. [He raises his. It's worth noting that he's not wearing his wedding ring. Tommy's not exactly on the market-- EVEN THOUGH HE'S SUCH A CATCH-- but he's coming to terms with the fact that he's never gonna see Jeanie again. Well, "coming to terms" with the help of space beer. Tommy drops his hand and plucks at his guitar idly, still smiling that thin, sarcastic smile.]

You know, I'm still not convinced this place isn't hell. [He looks at the camera for a beat, thinking, as if he wants to say something else... then leans forward to cut the transmission.]

[OOC: SORRY FOR POSTING AND RUNNING FOR... THE ENTIRE DAY. My net crapped out very shortly after I posted this, then DW wouldn't let me log in ablhailfhwioho. Tags will commence in the morning once I've had some sleep.]

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[ okay, so she doesn't 100% believe this about herself anymore, but she knows lying might be better than making him feel more cut off than he already is. ..not that she's great at the whole comforting thing, she's actually shit at it. but. she can try. ]

Pretty sure I am. I mean, I don't remember dying, but bedtime translating to snack time for a hoard of zombies isn't exactly unheard of. [ she squints, shakes her head ] I don't really let myself think about it. Doesn't matter here, right? We're alive.

[Whoever he's expecting to respond, it's not Wichita. She just doesn't seem... dead to him. Maybe because he expects the other dead people to be as much of a mopey trainwreck as he is.]

I didn't think you-- Sorry.

[He considers, though, her question.]

It's just, it means we can't go home. [Far as he figures, anyway. He really doesn't have anything to back that hypothesis up.] Far as I figure, anyway. I don't buy that "time stands still" bullshit.

Don't be. I've been here long enough that it doesn't even feel like it was real anymore. [ since yeah, she's only a tiny bit convinced she might be dead. ] And yeah, but. Why would you wanna go back to a world that killed you? Gotta say, I'm not in much of a rush to get back to running from zombies. Or... waking up to find out I'm in the middle of turning into some zombie's --sandwichita.

This place might suck, but for us it's a second chance.

[Is on screen and raises his hand. Why keep it a secret?] And this isn't hell or the underworld.

I've been there.

[Tommy arches his brow, then he laughs a little. Well, you meet all kinds of people on the Tranquility.]

Get the fuck out of here. What's it like? All fire and brimstone and shit?

[No one ever takes him seriously.]

Some places are, yeah. It's mostly filled with wondering souls. Think of it as a waiting room. That you never get to leave.

what if you can go back alive from here

would you ?

i think so sometimes i want to but then i wonder what the fuck i've got going for me

[He had a wife. She was worth going back to. But if he's stuck here, if he can't ever see her again, if he's dead, then he doesn't want to torture himself thinking about Jeanie.]

what about you?

if I don't go back alive there'll probably be like

another world war? or something . . .

I like guess it's kind of a 'have to' thing probably

does this ship ever stop anywhere ?

[She decides she's not going to answer that question, at least right off. Because technically speaking, she was pretty dead, but it strikes her as insensitive to make her "but i got better" joke to someone who may actually have died. Instead she tilts her head to the camera]

Do you remember dying? Before waking up here, I mean.

No, it's just this... [He motions to his head.] this big fucking blur. [The only reason he's convinced he's dead is because of what he saw during that week of fog and bizarro nightmares.]

Yeah, like this isn't a huge fuckin' club aboard this fuckin' ship. I'm startin' to think it's more or less the fuckin' majority, the wway some people hint at their unscrupulous endin' like it's some kinda cliffhanger wwe gotta stick around for.

[Tommy snorts.] Yeah, I figured I wasn't the only one. Thought there'd be more of us, though, I mean, with all the fucked up places people come from...

Some people can survvivve evven in fucked up situations so I'm not surprised there are plenty'a people here wwho think they havve somethin' to go back to.

[ Franziska's still new enough for this all to be some sort of novelty. ]

You personally know of such men?

[ Because she'd seen one for herself, one who was supposed to be dead back home... but perhaps this was just the ramblings of a drunken fool. Indeed, her disdain is rather clear on her face. ]

What men, dead men? [He leans back on his palms and shrugs.] Yeah, you're looking at one.

Oh? So how did you die?

[ Tact, what's that? ]

Are you even going to remember these conversations come tomorrow morning? [ If not, October might actually be willing to chat about it.

Of course, anything said over the comms is apparently saved forever, so maybe she'll do this in person. If he's that drunk. ]

[Tommy laughs. Is his drunken state really that obvious? He's so used to it by now; it's practically his default.

He taps the communicator.]

Don't need to remember. That's what this is for.

And here I thought it was to keep track of everyone and make it so we're not running around the big ass ship all the time.

I myself am not counted among them, though— [ She thinks of Westeros, of those long dead there who walk these halls as if death had never visited them. ] —I have known some, during my time here. These dead men you ask after.

Edited 2012-10-26 01:09 (UTC)

What happened to them? [There's actually a hint of optimism in his voice now:] Did they go home?

[Like anyone would know for sure. Once they're gone from the ship, that's it, right? No way of getting updates from people who aren't around anymore.]

[ Alayne — always mindful and observant of people, especially those she does not yet know — notes that hint of optimism. In truth, it makes her sad. Her expression grows sympathetic and kind, her mouth pinching with apology. Of course she does not have an answer, but the way the stranger grasps for one makes Alayne wish she did. That he is drunk sets her at vague unease, but such has always been the way with drunkards in her past. ]

Forgive me— I cannot say for certain. Some leave and many do not return, though there are a choice few that are given passage back to the Tranquility. Of these few, I know of no 'dead men', as you say.

[ Alayne ducks her chin and dips a bow. ] I am sorry you have suffered so.

It's a far cry from the usual image of Hell, but I'll accept it.

How do you know you died? Could be someone patched you back up and sent you here.

At least hell's got an okay bar.

[He pauses. It's a possibility he's considered: what if he's just patched up, what if he was abducted by the ship before he pulled the trigger. But it's something he ultimately doesn't believe-- not after seeing Arthur. It's too similar to his situation to be a coincidence. He pulled the trigger, and there's no fixing that. Even if he's alive here, he's certain he's dead back home.]

There's some things you can't patch up.

Then how are we supposed to explain those of us who've not died?

[ jenna's expression is wry as she just raises her hand, shrugging a little after she lowers it. ]

You think you can ever get back home?

Depressing, honest answer or the public happy face one?

[ oh, but doesn't this catch irene's attention. there's a little hitch of breath, but her voice is steady when she replies. ]

What an ominous question to ask.

I don't know if it's ominous... It's just been in on my mind. [Kind of obsessively since Silent Hill.]

This isn't hell, dear. There are too many sanctimonious souls aboard for that.

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