First sight [text]

[godseer]

No sooner do I finish one interstellar voyage than I find myself the unwitting participant of a second one.
I hope, for all our sakes, that its ending is not quite as explosive as my first.
I have my misgivings about this ship, but sudden and catastrophic destruction is not one of them.
That would be too easy.

To the part-time residents of the two universes I've intimately familiarized myself with, hello again.
To everyone else, greetings. My name is Rose Lalonde.
I look forward to the new acquaintanceships, brotherhoods, and nemeses of the coming days here. I get the feeling that we're going to need them.
I have no intention of blindly submitting to the whims of whomever is in charge here. I shall proudly wear citrus as my hue of choice when it suits me. Noir doesn't feel especially appropriate given recent events.

Comments

[godseer]

Hello, Tavros.
I remember the last time we talked, you were asking for advice on winning the affections of my undeniable yet insufferable brother.
Tell me, were your attempts successful?

I believe that I would very much enjoy meeting you in person.

[peanutblooder]

yESSSSS!!!!!
sOOOOO SUCCESSFUL!
tHE FIRST TIME,
uH,
dID NOT GO SO WELL,
bUT THEN i TURNED THE GAS UP,
bY FOLLOWING YOUR SAGEST ADVICE,
aND SET FLAMES TO SERIOUSLY UNHEALTHY,
aND BURNED HIM IN A FASHION THAT THE TOP MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS COULD ONLY DESCRIBE AS,
tOTALLY SICK!

[godseer]

I'm glad I could help.
However, I've seen him since, and it appears the burns you inflicted were not mortal wounds. Perhaps you can yet improve your methods.
Have you considered consulting the elder poetical masters? I can only get you so far.
Dickinson, Keats, and Pope are good places to start, if together inadequate to fully supercharge your ill combustions.

[peanutblooder]

pROBABLY HE JUST DID NOT WANT TO LOSE FACE IN FRONT OF YOU,
wHICH IS UNDERSTANDABLE,
i HAD HIM SPEECHLESS WITH HORROR,
iT WAS, bASICALLY, ePIC,
bUT OKAY,
tHESE ARE HUMAN MASTERS,
oF THE SLAM POETRY ARTS?
yOU HAVE NOT STEERED ME WRONG YET, rOSE HUMAN,
sO, iF YOU THINK i SHOULD, i WILL LOOK INTO THEM!
,,,
aS MUCH AS i AM ABLE, gIVEN THE WHOLE INABILITY TO REALLY LOOK INTO ANYTHING RIGHT NOW,
fOR REASONS OF BEING SPACESHIP-SNATCHED,

[godseer]

That's not hard to believe. The opaque semicircular lenses that grace his visage could hide any number of unplumbed depths of emotion. The clogs of discontentedness blocking those depths are in sore need of a plunger, and affronting his self-esteem could only worsen it.
Write down the authors and leave them on your person. Maybe when you're returned home, the authors will stick with you. I'd forgotten about this ship's inexorable lack of culture.

[peanutblooder]

i WILL DO THAT,
i GUESS,
,,,
wHY DO YOU THINK HE'S DISCONTENT?
hE SEEMS LIKE A GUY WHO, uH, bASICALLY ALL OF HIS SHITS IN A CENTRAL LOCATION,
uH,
i ASK THIS PURELY FOR RESEARCH PURPOSES,
oF COURSE,

[godseer]

A strong feeling of insuperiority.
Dave is the only one of us on the ship who hasn't reached the God Tier yet.
And even when he eventually does, he is given a hoodie that is more than vaguely shaped like the puppet probiscuoi he dreads so much.
Those constantly broken swords can't help his self-esteem, either.

[peanutblooder]

oKAY,
tHERE ARE PARTS OF THAT WHICH i DO NOT UNDERSTAND,
eVEN A LITTLE,
bUT, i GUESS, iF CREATING IMAGERY,
oF A SPECIFICALLY INSULTING MANNER TO, uH, hUMAN SYMBOLIC UNDERSTANDINGS,
tHAT COULD REALLY WEAR A GUY DOWN!
i MEAN, uHHH, tHIS IS GOOD MATERIAL,
tHAT i CAN CERTAINLY USE TO CAUSE FURTHER BURN DAMAGE,
tO DELICATE COOL KID PSYCHES,
aND STUFF,
pLEASE CONTINUE,
yOU SEEM TO HAVE MANY INSIGHTS,

[godseer]

Look at it this way. Images of protruding appendages are taken in our culture in much the same way medium-sized liquid receptacles are taken in yours. Pepper your rap battles with frequent references to them, and you should have him reeling in no time.

[peanutblooder]

,,,
tHIS HAS TO DO WITH CROTCH-DACHSNUDS, aND BONE BULGES,
dOESN'T IT?

[godseer]

You're very perceptive. You'd make a good Seer, if you weren't already an Heir.

[peanutblooder]

wOW, rOSE, tHAT IS A PRETTY BIG COMPLIMENT!
tHANK YOU, wOW,

[godseer]

You're welcome. All you need to do now is gather as much information as possible, and then some, and gain the power to see through certain opaque prophetic surfaces. Think you can do that?