ataraxion | 008; Voice

[Welcome back to another exciting adventure in the world of Topher Brink. There's a methodical clanking of tools and, once again, it seems Topher has turned his communicator on with the purpose of saying something, and then gotten distracted. Luckily, you're not stuck with ten minutes of dead silence with the actual sounds of someone working. In fact, it's only a few seconds before he starts talking.]

Sometimes I really think I'm the only one who doesn't spend an hour of every... relative day, I guess, thinking how bad I wanna go home. Don't get me wrong. I didn't get possessed by demons or nearly assimilated into a hive mind or chewed on by hellbeasts back home, and all of those things suck, but... It's not that bad. Everyone dies eventually, right? Why not die in space. ...Okay, so it's a touch cynical and I know- I'm terrifying the children. Cover their ears, ban that last bit from future broadcasts, whatever... The point is...

[There's a pause, followed by a pained noise, because genius here probably pinched his fingers or something.] The point is, uh... [Oh, did he have a point? He totally had one.]

... I don't remember what the point is, but I'll tell you something else. Hayley's post got me thinking about the whole... lack of dates thing. And I know it doesn't mean much to most of you, but it was, like... Late May or something when I showed up here and I've been here for eight months now, which means if time in space weren't so kerflooey, it'd be late January. So that means I'm 28 years old now, which... Yeah, that means exactly what I'm implying.

And this is not some big extravagant plea for gifts or attention or anything. I was just thinking about how this time last year, my birthday went by unnoticed and most of the time... Yeah, let's just say I've never had many people to celebrate it with. But here... If I said I wanted to gather some of my buddies up and sit in a common room and... I dunno, raid the library for something watchable and eat cake... It could happen. Not that I'm suggesting that either, because I have my doubts about whether the library has the best kind of bad science fiction when we're living the best kind of bad science fiction, but I could do it. And that means a lot to me.

Ah, I found my way back to the point. With all the bad stuff that happens here and the imminent badness continuing to loom over us and the fact that we miss the people we left behind back home... We can't forget that for some of us... This stupid ship has actually given us something. Fresh starts, the families we never knew we needed, friends, whatever. And that's a good thing.

[There's a thoughtful sigh.] I dunno. It does kinda make a guy wonder what happens if we do all go home. Sure, we lose all the bad things, but what about the stuff we actually wanna remember?

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[Edgeworth crosses his arms. That...really did sound very insincere.]

And you could grant the same.

You didn't actually do anything to me except ask me questions, so... Yeah. Already forgiven. [At least he admits he was the one in the wrong here. THAT IS PROGRESS.]

[He clears his throat.]

Very well, then.

[And, uncomfortably:]

Has someone organized a celebration for you?

I'm not gonna make anyone throw me a big party. I mean, I can't even prove it's January. A few people offered me cake and gifts and that's fine with me. I didn't have a whole mess of awesome birthdays back home. This is... surprisingly better. [Which is half a lie- his birthdays were awesome, but in retrospect, imprinting someone to be your ideal friend to spend a day with you is sort of sad and pathetic.]

[There's a slight note of relief in his voice.]

All right. That is good to hear. [Aaand then Miles the Awkward realizes what he said - ] Er - not that they were lacking in - you used the term "awesomeness," I believe? I mean that it is good that your expectations are not so very high. [...No, that also sounds wrong, somehow, though he's not sure how.] You'll not be disappointed.

Edited (WHOOPS FREUDIAN SLIP) 2012-09-06 19:33 (UTC)

[With the vaguest touch of condescension.] It's so cute that you're trying, Miles.

[Stiffly:]

Fine. I'll be silent, then, if that is what you desire.

[He kinda laughs. Sorry, bro.] You couldn't be quiet even if I had asked... Which I'm not asking, BTW.

So what do you want? For me to continue speaking so that you have a continued target for your laughter?

I'm laughing with you. If you ever laughed, you'd appreciate the concept.

That's foolish. I'm not laughing.

Because you take everything so seriously all the time. Trust me. You would totally feel better if you took the time to laugh at yourself. I laugh at myself all the time.

Of course. Because that's precisely what I need - to be thought of as a figure so absurd, even I cannot see myself with any gravity.

Dude, look at me. You've seen me. I was one of the most respected neurologists in a company that only took in the best to begin with. Our skills get us the job, and after that no one's gonna care about a few glaring personality flaws.

...But your efficacy at your job depends purely and solely upon your skills and intellect. Mine depends on how I am perceived.

In a courtroom, Miles. This? Ain't a courtroom.

Then, pray tell, where is our courtroom?

I don't think anyone's using the fourth floor rec room...

I'm being serious.

So was I...

We're without law here, Dr. Brink. We've no method of punishing criminals. So what is there to be done?

We have a brig that people have been thrown into, so unless you wanna reinvent the firing squad, all the tools are there. You just have to get people on board with it.

But until such a time as I do, there is no true courtroom. Do you comprehend?

[YOU ARE SO DIFFICULT...] Okay, I get it.

...Good. It's not a pleasant thing, but the sort of person I would be in the courtroom...I must be that person always here.

[voice]

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Re: [voice]

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[voice] Edgeworth didn't mean it to be dirty. I did.

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