video.

[foolproofed]

[Marty has retrieved his things from the locker; themos-bong, I've missed you so much. So, so much. He has it in his lap and sets it aside, plenty done with it for a good while. It's given him clarity; time to reflect on his life, on his future, on an evil ship doomed to ruin him as much as everything else has.

Okay, so he actually just came into his room, curled up, and cried for a little bit. And then smoked more. It's his depression solution.

But he's good now. He's cross-legged on his bed, looking as though he's been pondering considerably on the state of the Marty. Only whatever redness to his eyes can be contributed to his bong, if anyone questions it--he's too busy focusing on the now, instead of the then. It'll do him no good to let it drag him down; he can keep having all this doubt and survivor's guilt, but he can't let it crush him--because it wouldn't be fair to the others, when they never got the chance to come back.

No, he can figure it all out. He can think long and hard and maybe he can help these people where he couldn't help his own.]

Have you ever wondered if this place is your world's future? I know that's really morbid thinking and all, but this has to be in somebody's future--doesn't it? Maybe something crazy happened, people had nowhere to go, so they ran off to space. It's not like it's the craziest idea out there; we had--whole movies dedicated to stuff like this. Syfy originals. Books. Hell, I think I heard a radio story from ye olden days about it.

[He waves a finger at the air, looking off distantly.]

... I just can't figure out where everything went crazy aboard the ship--maybe there's some... entity. Like a spirit, or a god. Maybe it's getting its sick thrills off making us dance around like little lab rats. Or maybe it's whatever those hypothetical entities created. Maybe--maybe we're just being watched by something that brought us here just to see what we'll do. People say there's no reason we're here, or we haven't found one. But if I had to bet my piggy-bank back home on something... it'd be that. I'd guess it's also why it won't let anyone go out too far from home plate. Or why there are people who aren't people anymore.

Whatever we do, we gotta stick together. Or else... things'll just go from worse to worser. We gotta hang in there. Fuck Smiley and the monsters and the lack of wonderful snack foods--we gotta... just stick together...

[He's rambling now, whoops. Sighing at the sir, he reaches over, grabs his bong and talks as he turns the top, condensing the whole thing down into a normal thermos mug. ILU, thermy.]



I'm gonna go try to invent new things in the kitchen. Anyone wanna go? This place needs way more comfort food, and I'm pretty competent at Macguyver-ing together something worthy of consumption. Might even be able to do it without setting the whole ship on fire, too.

[HA HA it was a joke

just a joke

and then he wanders off without shutting down the feed. Distantly, and growing fainter:]

Maybe I can manufacture some space strain of toaster strudels. 

[And true to his word, he'll be in the kitchens to see what awful abominations he can make wunderbar. He'll answer anything there, too, while he's at it and he remembers to retrieve his comm. Now... what does this place have in the way of sweet stuff? Surely lots of cans and cans and cans and oh look boxes. Feel free to actually find him there, casually drinking from said thermos.]

Comments

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

[Wow, you look like that one guy that helped her out once, but different somehow? Also, the crew number on the transmission was off.

But none of this mattered, nope, because there was one thing she had to know.]

Toaster strudels? Eheheh?

[She knew of toasters and she knew what strudels are. But what kind of sorcery could toasters and strudels make combined?]

[video]

[foolproofed]

Toaster strudels.

[He affirms it, because who wouldn't know toaster strudels? They're the best things ever, outside of Hometown Buffet on Monday morning and a thrift store with clearance items.]

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

[Part of her wanted to pretend to know what the hell he was talking about, so she didn't look stupid again, but that kind of thing would probably backfire later.]

But what are they exactly?

[video]

[foolproofed]

[What?

Whaaat? He leans his head back, as if stunned, and then looks completely pitiful.]

You poor, sweet vixen. You've never enjoyed the flaky goodness of a properly baked toaster strudel?

[the horror]

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

No...?

["Flaky" goodness? So it wasn't toasters that looked like strudels? Huh...]

But how do the strudels even fit in the toaster? Hahaha? Wouldn't they be too long and thick to fit in it? Wouldn't the stuff inside melt and ruin it?!

[video]

[foolproofed]

Nah, no, not at all! They're just the right size to fit in a toaster--the middle's surrounded by bread, so it doesn't leak or anything. It's just the right kind of consistently when you're in need of somethin' quick to make but satisfying for midnight cravings. The chocolate ones? The best.

Maybe I can figure out a way to make them here.

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

So they're more like thin, mini strudels? [They... didn't really sound like much of a strudel at all, but whatever.]

Maybe you can, but it might be a little hard finding filling to put in the middle of them, eheheh.

[video]

[foolproofed]

Bah, it can't be too hard! We'll just have to go native. A little fruit from the gardens, maybe? Do we have dough? I bet we can magic up some dough.

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

You probably could get some, but you'll likely have to bargain with whoever grew the fruit there -- eeheehee -- people are pretty touchy about that kind of thing, around here.

And I-- I'm actually not sure if we have dough or not. I've been mostly surviving on instant noodles, honestly.

[video]

[foolproofed]

Well, don't worry--

What's your name?

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

[a shrug.] You just have to dig around anyway, no big deal.

Heeheehee -- I'm mostly known as Laughing Beauty or LB, though. Sometimes I'm an octopus too.

Who're you?

[video]

[foolproofed]

Well, Beauty, the name's Marty.

[did you say--

you know what? i'm gonna roll with it. fuck it.]

How's the octopus life treatin' ya?

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

[She shrugs a little, not seeming to mind his comment at all.]

Pretty good, it saved me from getting poisoned by rats, you know?

[YES, because she's totally going to make this situation even weirder than it has to be.]

[video]

[foolproofed]

... I was unaware that rats were poisonous in nature.

[wait what]

Oooor that octopuses were resilient against the venom of... rats.

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

They are around here! Eeheehee! So don't go poking around the genetics lab alone, hmm? [She holds her hands out, demonstrating about how big those rodents were.] Not to mention they about this size!

And they are if they have the proper armor!

[video]

[foolproofed]

Goddamn! Last thing we need is giant mutant rats, but there ya go... Can't win for losing. Don't worry about me wandering around--that's a death wish from the get go.

...

Octopuses have armor, huh?

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

Heheh, well then you'll probably be fine.

And this Octopus has armor at least! Or rather the octopus is my armor, but-- [She just trails off on that sentence, opting to give a shrug instead.]

[video]

[foolproofed]

So--you have armor shaped like an octopus. Right?

Because that would make way more sense than what was in my head.

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

Well yeah, eeheehee -- I don't look like some octopus creature, do I?

But--! [shrug.] It's probably not going to make a lot of sense either way. It's probably better to not try to understand it.

[video]

[foolproofed]

Noooo, nonono, I'd love to understand it! How's it work? Do you just... put it on your head? Can you walk like an octopus?

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

Well, if you want to know...

Basically, the suit I'm wearing right now has a lot of cords -- eheheh -- most of the suit just kind of plugs right into it! There's even some cords here in the back of my head.

[LB lifts that cord up for a little bit, eventually letting it dangle back down.]

I think it just moves according to what my brain wants it to do, so I can just let the tentacles do the walking for me and I can climb up different shit. I've got a mask and a piece that attaches to the back too, though.

It's... a little complicated to describe.

[video]

[foolproofed]

Sure sounds it.

So--you're dressed up as an octopus. What then? Not deep sea swimming, I bet.

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

I'm not even sure if that thing would even work in the water, to be honest.

Heehee -- but typically I find somewhere to hide, find something to kill...

[She shrugs.] It depends on what I'm doing in the day.

[video]

[foolproofed]

... [oh shit what if this chick is crazy

what if she targets guys who talk to her about octopuses]

Sounds... interesting...

It's kinda--funny, having a suit based off a water critter not work in water. Don't you think?

[video]

[fuckinghysterical]

Hey, I wasn't the one who designed the thing, you know! Eheh!

... but yes, that is a little strange. Though you don't typically have to go into combat, when you're in water either.